Wednesday, January 11, 2012

All In The Timing

© 2012 Norman Stolpe

When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars that you have established; what are human beings that you are mindful of them, mortals that you care for them? Yet you have made them a little lower than God, and crowned them with glory and honor. You have given them dominion over the works of your hands.
Psalm 8:3-6 NRSV

In your book were written all the days that were formed for me, when none of them as yet existed. How weighty to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! I try to count them—they are more than the sand; I come to the end—I am still with you.
Psalm 139:16-18 NRSV

Since at least his college football days NFL quarterback Tim Tebow has been blatantly demonstrative about his Christian faith. Some have applauded; some have scoffed. With a couple of professional seasons he seems to have matured some, but a one-knee kneeling prayer posture has become his trademark – tebowing.

Some skeptics have suggested with ridicule that he is praying for his team to win. Of course, I don’t know what or even if Tim Tebow is actually praying when he kneels on the football field. I suspect (or at least hope) that he is not asking God for a win but for injury-free good performances by all. I’m enough of a realist to acknowledge that players, coaches and fans in the enthusiasm of the contest might pray for a win, but only a little reflection is needed to realize such prayers from opposite sides of the field would be praying against each other and couldn’t all be answered affirmatively. Is it too much to hope all believing athletes would ask that God will be honored not so much by athletic performance as by positive, respectful relationships and character.

Perhaps without fully realizing it, some of the cynical commentaries have pointed to a much deeper issue. I saw one that pointed out the minuscule significance of a football game (even in the playoffs) compared to the vastness of the universe. Why would a God who created and upholds the universe give any attention to a game of human sport? While more global than cosmic, perhaps even more disturbing is to ask why God would care about a game of human sport in a world full of the suffering of violence, famine, injustice and oppression?

In my pastoral experience I have frequently felt that God orchestrated the timing of the details of my daily ministry. Many more times than I feel comfortable accounting for by chance, I have walked into the hospital or nursing home room just as the hospice representative has walked out. I can’t prove it, but I have felt sent by God at just that moment when an individual and their family is facing the stark reality of the end of life. It’s not that I can fix anything, but somehow people seem to understand the timing of my presence as a sign that God is with them in the moment of their extremity. Over and over again I have prayed Psalm 31:5 with people. “Into your hands, we commit” the spirit of the one who is approaching death’s door. Yes, the words of Jesus from the cross take on a great power no matter how many times I come back to them. What is repetitive for me is fresh for those who hear it.

Monday of this week three fairly intense pastoral situations called for my attention. I tried to figure out how best to schedule my response to the people in pain with my usual get the week started responsibilities. I did get to each one but not at the time I had intended. Interruptions, some mundane and some significant, kept my schedule just a little off kilter.

I arrived for a hospital visit with the seriously ill spouse of a church member about an hour later than I had hoped. I was feeling some regret at being behind. I was somewhat apprehensive as the patient I was visiting didn’t know me and did not participate in any church. As I turned the corner off of the elevator down the corridor, I saw the patient’s spouse walking toward me. After a brief chat, we went together to the patient’s room. I was warmly welcomed by the patient and believe the visit was positive.

The patient’s spouse walked with me back to the elevator and out to the parking lot. “You got here at just the right time. It was perfect. I know God sent you. Thanks for coming.” I also felt the propitiousness of the timing of my visit and mused about how it might have been different had I come an hour earlier when I had planned. Did God have a hand in the office minutia that got me to the hospital hallway just as the patient’s spouse was coming? Two minutes later we would have passed each other on the elevators.

At one level Psalms 8 and 139 affirm God’s intricate, intimate involvement in personal human affairs. Psalm 8 even acknowledges the awesome mystery of the God of all creation taking thought for mere humans. Yes, I believe in the subtle prompting of the indwelling Holy Spirit. Nevertheless, I marvel at the inscrutability of God’s involvement in such timing. I also struggle with the realization that people in much more dire circumstances cry out for God who seems totally absent. Why should I or the people who come across my path receive the grace of sensing God’s presence while millions of others, some of whom are undoubtedly more pious and faithful than I, suffer? Is God thinking about them? If so, what can God possibly be thinking?

I am not writing to find an answer to these conundrums, and certainly not to propose that I know an answer. Rather I am writing to explore my own journey with Jesus. To ask of myself, where is God in these experiences of timing? Am I walking with Jesus in all of my questioning? Does my puzzling reveal or obscure God from my spiritual vision?